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At the chalkface: Tim and Moll

Teaching staff
They’re not quite Romeo and Juliet, more a meeting of like minds, sort of de-schooling sweethearts, extra-curricular chums, partners in crime

Timothy Winters. Tiny Tim? Remember him? Lives in the parish of Ladbroke Grove. Diminutive, introvert, a wit and fabulist? Well, he’s now in the 9th year. It’s time for his bi-annual report. Is he on message? I’m afraid not. Is the little fellow meeting his targets? Not a lot. He’s on nodding terms at best. How are his Learning Outcomes? Negligible.

Apart from English with Ms Juppe and Art with Ms Caravaggio, he’s making the opposite of progress.

He still lurches dizzily from subject to subject like a pinball in a maze. He’s still mostly in the lower streams. The longeurs are longer, the tedium stronger – and the detentions ever more recurrent. His teachers keep conking out and leaving. He still pines for the divine Madame De Beauvoir, his former French teacher, who fled alas, unhinged, back to Paris.

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