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At the chalkface: Billy Plum

More importantly, the school needs his C for its league table position. It’s an exam factory. To this end, an army of help has been assembled. For nigh-on 18 months he’s been in a C/D hot-housing class...

Billy Plum, son of Dennis, is part of a long line of Plums, a dynasty of Plums, who’ve attended the school. You may recall that I taught Plum the Elder in the 90s – and his brother Nigel. Both were genetically on the cusp of things, the C/D cusp of things – phlegmatic, stolid, nice, cheerful characters.

But Nature ruled. Nurture didn’t. Dennis eventually got a C grade in English at the sixth attempt. I think the examiners finally gave up. He just wore them out. Nigel didn’t. He was a D for life.

But it didn’t really matter. There were jobs. Dennis made air conditioners for fridges and Nigel is my jolly postman. These were more relaxed times, when exams mattered less. You weren’t merely a learning outcome.

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