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At the chalkface: Pressure drop

Like a boxer’s second you give the same fatuous tips. Get in early, get lots of nutritional sleep and breakfast, get in the zone, get your timing right, don’t think too much, and don’t swear at the referee/examiner. Yeah. Yeah.

“What you do today will echo through eternity!” boomed my old head of English with mock solemnity at the trembling hordes before their GCSE Literature exam. A line from Gladiator. Half the tots smiled or laughed, hip to hyperbole or humour. Half looked puzzled, blank or just plain terrified. Not hip to it. Couldn’t we have just given them a D grade, passed the rest, and gone home?

Probably not. Exams are not the time for levity.

Well, the season is again upon us. Stress and anxiety and migraine and meltdown rule, especially for the more sensitive and imaginative and clever. Brutally reductive, these exams are a mere fever of information retrieval to be regurgitated like acid reflux.

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